u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
