i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize