Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
