So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
