There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
