She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
It's never too late to be topless.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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