Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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