Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize