you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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