So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize