i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
