Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
