Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
if only i could text you this smell
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Randomize
