I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
