Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
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