HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
