why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Randomize