Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
sarcasm needs its own font
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Randomize
