I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
