Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Enjoy the penises
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Randomize
