Can i not drive my cunt home
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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