But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
