I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize