when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize