No awkward lesbian experiences without me
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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