you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
