she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
