Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
