I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
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