I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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