i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
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