Cold hands, warm shart.
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
