he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
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