T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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