But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Randomize
