North Korea, Best Korea!
there was a trapeze. enough said
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
