hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
