Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
