i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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