OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
