Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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