I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
