I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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