Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
dude. I can hear the air.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
