Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
