No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Can I color on your dick again?
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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