we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize