ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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