just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
