He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Randomize
