There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Randomize
