too bad you live with your parents still
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
