so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
